Apostate

Why did you leave?
You say it’s because
the home was a lie,
that there is no way
to find God,
for all ways
lead to God,
and very few
lead to the devil.

I say I will not,
that I will not leave
my Father’s path,
and you ask
“What if it is a lie?”

But how could the hand
that lead me through fire
and night,
filled with vast oceans
and mountains
be a lie?
How could my imagination
lead me through that?

How could a trick of my mind
prove me through trials
no one can explain
how I surpassed?
Was it madness
that supported me
all those years?

And what of the temple
where we burned
with joyful fire–
was that also
a mistake?
A spontaneous trick
of psychology?

No angel came down to me
to beat my brow with thunder
of the truth.
No life saving miracle
changed my view.
I cannot calculate
the existence
of truth
or God.

But there is no way
I could ever deny it.

So I ask again:
Why did you leave?