Take me to the other side of your brain where you're actually honest, and mean to do what you say you'll do, rather than pretending to yourself it's the truth. Take me to the other side of that happy face to what you actually feel and think, whenever you promise and lie, side by side, … Continue reading Take Me to the Other Side
Tag: anxiety disorders
How to Fix Yourself
How to Fix Yourself: "Take a deep breath, without throwing up. Think of happy things, without thinking at all. Try to figure out why you are feeling. Reason and logic out your emotions. Let go of control to gain your control. Depend on this pill to be independent. Love yourself 'cause you don't trust others. And … Continue reading How to Fix Yourself
On Panic Attacks
Keep the light on. The darkness scares the little in the old me, and I have forgotten how to tame it. Leave the light on, forget the electric bill, and let me sleep just for a night beneath that glow. Keep the light on, just while I sleep. In night and darkness I am alone. … Continue reading On Panic Attacks
Wake Me Up When I’m Smarter
What do I do now, Father? The die's been cast the game now bought and the red numbers higher than ever, while I, here, have no hands-on in controlling the flow of money. Blank, hard, cold cash. It hurts the lack thereof, but hurts more than I even want it at all. There is no … Continue reading Wake Me Up When I’m Smarter
Whisper
Quiet, now. For once your fears or discomfort are whistled to, he shall deny them. But they shan't dissolve. So whisper to the darkness that something's wrong and let it echo back. Or perhaps the abyss will swallow it. So hush. For if wrong's swallowed you'll want it too, you'll lean over. But should someone … Continue reading Whisper
Morning Sickness
Last the days though one night is impossible. Survival through sheer what? Enduring cannot be wasting and withering, and begging for death. Many others have survived. Speak of the night like a fond ghost story, still tingling with horror, because newborns are worth it. Worth it... It's not the worth I fear, nor the lack … Continue reading Morning Sickness
We Manage Us
You make me queasy. You make me long to sleep the day away and never leave this quilted, padded hole, where no one can find me. You make me hurt. You make me dream of jamming screw drivers to my broken brain to dig out the part that malfunctions, no matter how necessary, so I … Continue reading We Manage Us
Deeper Ink
I want my ink to be deep and wide that my words should look sure and unmovable, rather than a thin scrabbled mess meant for temporary notes and reminder. Perhaps then I'll have more say more control over what I write and how it moves my world. Perhaps, then, I'll adore those thick inky strokes … Continue reading Deeper Ink
Unwanted Road Trip
Check one, sunrise. Head thump and eyes blur, because my walls stayed sleepless. Perhaps, because they weren't mine. Check two, morning. A purr, a groan, and press an engine past 200,000, because old is all we are. Check three, noon. Siestas are for the poor who have no time for them. And home is far … Continue reading Unwanted Road Trip
Author T.S. Lowe 